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| The best Fury Road poster... still kind of sucks doesn't it? |
It's
been thirty years since we saw Max. The last I saw of him, he was some bleeding
heart, kid-loving freak with a mullet saving kids after the
"poxyclypse". Max was awesome, selfish, and only apt to help people
out of a grudging sense of who he used to be. He was a wasteland anti-hero as
beloved for his no-nonsense attitude as he was for his ability to kick a little
ass. 30 years since Mad Max attempted to become a mainstream icon and failed
miserably, alienating fans all over the world with his corny, George Lucas-esque
plummet into safety and PG-13 cheese, Max is back in Mad Max: Fury Road. While
I personally get a kick out of Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, I still find that it
is nothing compared to the glorious excess that was The Road Warrior. It can't
even begin to compare to the spit and polish aesthetic of the original Mad Max
film. So a return to an R-rated Mad Max was more than welcome.
I found myself literally frothing to
get back into Max's world, despite some of the most banal trailers for a big-budget
movie I've ever seen. Where were all the freaks in bondage gear and sporting
equipment, content to let their butt cheeks hang out in the harsh sun of
Post-Apocalyptia? Where is the feeling of desolation and lawlessness? Most of
all, where the hell was Max?
With these questions in mind, I
dragged myself out to the theater for the first time in nine months. I believe
the last movie I saw was Annabelle, that boring little snooze fest about that
stupid doll. Sequels, bad comedies, and generic thrillers don't get my butt in the
seat anymore. Take your Avengers and cram it. Only R-rated action movies and
horror movies are capable of getting me to choose to waste two hours of my life
staring at a screen these days. After reviewing thousands of movies, I just
don't have it in me to waste any more of my life sitting on my butt watching mediocrity.
But Max has always been good to me, so I felt I owed it to him. After a quick,
post-work nap, I headed out into the theater, ready to see what they had done
to my beloved Max Rockatansky.
The short review is this: The movie
is pretty badass... with a few caveats, one of which is almost deal-breaking.
Piled high with jaw-dropping effects, there are action scenes in Fury Road that
will amaze you like the first time you saw someone drop some Mentos into a
2-liter bottle of Coke. Beforehand, I honestly thought the car chases would be
the most boring part of the film. After 17 Fast and Furious films, what the
hell can you really do with a car chase that hasn't been done before? With Fury
Road, we now know the answer; they can do shit that you never even dreamed of.
Buried under practical effects, cool
cars, and some outrageous characters, the action is easily the star of the
movie. George Miller's movie can only be described as an onslaught on the
senses. Explosions, collisions, a man in pajamas strapped to the front of a
vehicle playing a flame-spewing electric guitar, these are the things that
action movie dreams are made of. The film is literally an hour and fifty
minutes of action... and ten minutes of character development.
Of course, this brings me to my
biggest disappointment. This isn't a Mad Max movie. This is a movie about
Furiosa, and it should be entitled Mad Furiosa, which is a pretty dumb name by
the way. You think she has a brother named Angrycles somewhere?
The character of Mad Max, the whole
reason I even wanted to see this movie, is the least interesting character in
the movie. Mad Max isn't so much mad as he is utterly devoid of personality.
I'm starting to rethink my opinion of Tom Hardy, and we all should. Other than
a stellar portrayal of inmate Charlie Bronson, Tom Hardy has never really done
anything all that great. He looks good, but fails to bring anything substantial
to any of his roles. I watched Tom Hardy stumble through this role with gritted
teeth, thankful that Charlize Theron and the other members of the cast were there
to pick up the pieces. They are great; Tom Hardy is an extra in a leather
jacket who happens to get far too much face time. George Miller might want to
consider changing his name to Comatose Max if he plans on sticking with Hardy.
It might not be Tom Hardy's fault
completely, as the dialogue in the film is dry and not even interesting in a
laughable way. Characters spout out sentences composed of one syllable words
that are as forgettable as the last number that was called in a bingo game.
Max's lines are particularly bland. Gone is the loser charm of the Max
character, buried underneath the confused simplistic countenance of Hardy. The
Gibson Mad Max was a skinny underdog, who actually seemed like he was born to
lose, and who could hit you with a one-liner when needed. Hardy's Max? Well, he
just a muscular guy along for the ride.
Despite the issue of Max kind of
sucking, Fury Road is still a stellar action movie. It will wind up in my
collection eventually. When the sequels come out, as there are more movies
planned, I will be there, hoping beyond hope that Hardy can get it together and
understand what Max is all about. He's ruthless. He's a survivor. He only cares
because of a past that he can't reconcile. He's not a bounce around victim of
fate. He is the wind of change in a land that has no hope.
I'll give you one example of where
they went wrong with Max in this movie, and this involves some spoilers, but
they happen very early on in the film. Max is captured. They take his car, his
Interceptor from the original films... and he just let's it go. His one tie to
his old life and his past, and he just lets it go. The old Max would have
busted everyone in the chops, spit in his captors' faces, and found a way to
get that damn car back. Here's to Max being Max again in the near future.
Final
Summation: Come for the car chases, but don't expect to see Max. It's a good
action film that won't disappoint thrill seekers and most non-discriminating
fans of Mad Max. Myself, I've watched those damn movies so much that to see a neutered,
ineffectual Max is something I can hardly stand.
Points
Lost: -1 for not being entitled Mad
Furiosa, -1 for Tom Hardy's portrayal of Max which is lacking, -1 for some overwrought
scenes of emotionality, intruded upon by an at-times invasive score
Bonus
Points: +1 for nonstop scenes of action and that guitar dude with the flaming
guitar
Lesson
Learned: In the future, everyone forgets how to give people regular names that
aren't laughable. We had a baby! Let's name him Explosivo!
Burning
Question: When you think of the name Mad Max, do you interpret "mad"
to mean angry or crazy?
Mad
Max: Fury Road
8/10
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